Finding out that someone you care about has been sexually assaulted
can be a huge shock.
It can leave you unsure about your feelings and not knowing what to do or say or how to help them.
It is really difficult for a person to let someone know they have been sexually assaulted and it takes an enormous amount of courage and trust.
The person is often scared of not being believed, not being taken seriously, or that what they tell you will be told to other people against their wishes.
If someone confides in you…
If someone you care about tells you they have been sexually assaulted, here are some ideas of things that you can do to support them:
Listen to them.
Take them seriously.
Ask them if they want to talk to an adult and if they want support to do this.
Keep in contact with them and ‘check in’ with how they are.
Let them know it is not their fault.
Remember they are still the same person as before, try not to treat them different to how you used to.
It can be awkward
It can be really hard to know what to say or do if someone asks you to promise to keep a secret that they want to tell you.
It can be important to keep private certain information that you are told, however when it comes to issues of sexual assault of people aged under 16 years of age then there are certain things to know.
If someone you know has told you they are being sexually assaulted and they are under 16 years of age and they are currently being sexually assaulted or at risk of it happening again, then the safety of this person is the number 1 priority and becomes more important than keeping their information private.
This is what you could do or say:
“I know you don’t want me to tell anyone but I’m really worried about you.
I think it is really important that we let an adult know about this so they can help you to be safe”
Tell a trusted adult.
This may be a school teacher, a parent, school principal, a welfare worker or counsellor, someone on a telephone counselling line, an aunty, the police, a doctor or school nurse etc.
